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Hannah Hamm's 20 Reasons Why You Should Never Date a Boar!

Ziggy my love, precious Ziggy, this is for other boars and does not apply to you my sweet! You are pigture pigfect!
Your loving sow,
Hannah Hamm

  1. They always hog up all the conversation.
  2. They tell boaring stories.
  3. They make up pig tails.
  4. They act like hogs when they eat.
  5. They pig out at all hours of the day and night.
  6. They prefer riding piggy back to walking.
  7. They tend to pork out as they get older.
  8. They always want their pigtures taken.
  9. They think they are pigture perfect.
  10. They boar you to death.
  11. They tend to be pig headed.
  12. They think everyday is a pignic.
  13. They always want to play "this little piggy went to market".
  14. They pig all the good wallowing spots for themselves.
  15. They are notoriously known to be squealers.
  16. They hate grunt work.
  17. They always hog up the bed.
  18. They eat all the Hog n danz ice cream.
  19. They usually have too many pen pals.
  20. They are always wanting to be kissed and hogged.

A Hannah Hamm Original by Sharon Jean Updike,1998

 

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